living the world of hers; contradictions

bleaching session?

Feeling: unknown
Playing: power 98


On Sunday morning, boyflen called me after his usual soccer game for lunch. As I headed down, his few friends couldn’t help but commented.

First comment: I look “white”, did I go for a “bleaching” session?

Second comment: I look I’ve been deprive of food. I look skinner each week.


I have very good answers for both comments!

To the first, “No, I didn’t go for any bleaching session. I just didn’t go for sun tanning. Unlike schooling days, I hardly have enough time to be out in the sun now. The only time I am exposed to sunlight is lunch time.”

And to the second, “I don’t usually have much appetite after school or work. And I am picky with food. So I don’t eat much.”

Kris’ mummy complains I don’t eat enough. Whether I eat or not doesn’t make much of a difference. I think mama complained too on Friday, she asked why didn’t I eat when I was already finished with my dinner and was all cleaned up.


Not like I really chose to be white or skinny but I have poor time management and I am lazy. I rather sleep in during the weekend than to go out to suntan (alone), and this causes me to skip my breakfast and sometimes lunch.

I am not proud of this routine. I intend to change it. REALLY~
Just not yet. I am still tired.

Of course, I want a more fulfilling life filled with lots of activities but not right now.

Somehow I sense that I am recovering from the slight depression that I was in a few months back and learning to juggle work and school. I still struggle to feel good about myself. Till I am more ready to bounce up, I will still be in bed on weekends till noon. I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep, to make resolutions and end up not fulfilling it.


Still… Anyone wants to go sun tanning? Call me. I will try to wake up.

posted by JL @ 2:10 PM